


Stop Talking

by jupiter_james



Category: Mass Effect
Genre: M/M, ME1, PWP, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-07-09
Updated: 2013-07-09
Packaged: 2017-12-18 04:33:48
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,171
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/875680
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jupiter_james/pseuds/jupiter_james
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kaidan and Shepard's first night together.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Stop Talking

**Author's Note:**

> I was going to use most of this for another fic I was writing, but didn't, so here it is! I re-purposed it to suit their first night together before Ilos in ME1, because honestly, that love scene needed more, well... scene.

_Stop talking, Alenko. Just stop fucking talking._ What was he even saying? Blah, blah, courts martial. Something about being the best and the brightest? How screwed they were once this thing was over? _Oh, God. Idiot. Just stop talking_. 

Shepard's gaze is eating him alive. Is he even listening? Probably not. It's almost like he's _waiting_. Like a predator, not like a patient man.

Swallow hard. Just tell him what you really mean. _I can't lose you. We're what's important right now. We'll never get this chance again._ Finally getting to the heart of the matter.

"You make me feel..." Find the right damn words. You've already said enough of them. "Human."

The pause is only a heartbeat long. "Bunk here tonight, Kaidan. With me."

_Please, please,_ PLEASE, _stop talking. Give me a reason to stop._ Can't change anything? Good crew? Don't want mess anything up? _Keep going on like this and you'll never get laid again, Alenko._ Suddenly, he's done talking.

There are no more words. They've run out. Or run away, maybe. He's frozen in place, heart pounding in his ears. All he can do is watch Shepard closely. Beg him with his eyes. Will he understand? Understand that he _can't_ make the first move? Understand that if he breaks the regs just once, it'll feel like all his effort over all these years was for nothing? Even when it's something he wants so badly he can taste it. Even when it's something he needs so fundamentally that he can barely breathe without it.

Shepard knows, but he's not being nice about it. He makes Kaidan squirm under his deep blue gaze for more than a minute. But he gets it, and he gives in. He grabs Kaidan around the back of the neck, not gently, and yanks him forward, lips and tongue and teeth meeting forcefully. His arms wrap around Kaidan's shoulders, one at a time.

Instinctively, Kaidan reaches around Shepard's waist, pulling him closer for more body contact. _Thank you, God, he understands. I have to have this._ Shepard's already hard and lets out a satisfied grunt as their hips collide.

Kaidan can't stand it. His head is screaming nonsense too little, too late. _Serious breach of protocol._ He claws at Shepard's uniform. _Going to mess up the chain of command._ Shepard's deft, calloused hands are sweating as he finds warm, flushed skin under Kaidan's uniform. Touching every inch of flesh he can reach. _This is going to change everything._ Shepard's lips trail semi-experienced kisses along his neck and collar bone. Kaidan's whole body responds and pushes forward, not caring in the least what turns him on more; the erogenous zones his CO finds completely by mistake, or the fact that he knows Shepard's movements are being driven solely by desire for him.

Contact breaks as they both kick off their boots and the last pieces of clothing. There's a pause to the frantic action as Kaidan stands back up an arm's reach away from Shepard, completely exposed. Shepard doesn't say anything. He's assessing the situation. Taking in every inch of Kaidan. Somehow, it makes his hard-on twitch.

One step closes the distance. This time there's nothing frenetic about the embrace. Shepard takes Kaidan around the waist, sliding his body slightly upwards. Kaidan groans, every nerve ending firing pleasure back to his brain. He's light-headed as he dips his head forward for another kiss, exploring Shepard's impossibly full lips, tugging gently on the bottom lip with his teeth.

Without breaking contact, Shepard guides them back to the small bed. He slips down to a sitting position, lips trailing from collar to navel as he descends. Kaidan clenches his teeth, his hands running over Shepard's head. _Feels so good. Like I should have been doing this all along._

Shepard's lips are firm and sure as they nip over Kaidan's hipbones and abs as his left hand reaches up to cup his balls. His laugh sounds more like a sigh when Kaidan's knees buckle and he has to brace himself against Shepard's shoulders. _I can never have enough of this. Getting lost._

Shepard's tongue traces up Kaidan's dick. Lips join tongue on the way back down. Kaidan can't even think anymore. He clenches and unclenches his fists. Pushes Shepard away before he passes out. Shepard rummages under his pillow and tosses Kaidan a small bottle of lube.

Kaidan kneels on the foot of the bed. _This is real. This is happening. I'll never be able to forget this. Never want to forgive myself._ He strokes himself, slicking his entire length with the lube. Shepard is watching him with the same open, wanting expression he's been wearing since Kaidan entered his quarters. He spreads his legs and Kaidan crawls up the bed over him until they are nose to nose. Should he say something? Is there anything he can possibly say about what's happening to him?

"Shepard," he breathes.

"Do it, Kaidan," is the whispered answer. The answer to everything he's been asking himself this whole time.

He slides into Shepard slowly, carefully, shocked that he fits so easily. Turned on beyond belief knowing that Shepard had prepared himself well beforehand. Had his body and the supplies already taken care of. Looking out for his subordinate. Always.

Shepard arches against him with a long moan, muscles straining. Kaidan trails a light touch over his neck muscles, rubbing gently to relieve the strain as he begins to move at an unhurried pace. Shepard's hands slide over his thighs, bracing on his hips, digging his fingers in.

_Remember everything about this. Memorize it._ Heat and flushed skin. Shepard's face. Eyes squeezed shut and mouth open. The sound of his voice rubbed raw with desire. Hips rising insistently with every thrust.

Kaidan falls forward on his hands, feeling Shepard's breath on his cheek as he thrusts in again and again, harder and harder. Driven by Shepard's body. The pace of his CO is the standard. What he will forever follow. He will never be able to march to a different beat, no matter what happens.

But he knows at the last second he must be the one to take the final lead and finish it. He breaks the tempo and thrusts several times, hard and long. Shepard dances beautifully for him, hands flying back to grab the pillow under his head in a white-knuckled grip and he spasms and releases. Thrilled and satisfied, Kaidan thrusts once more before he's swept along with Shepard's hard, beautiful orgasm.

When it's over, Kaidan's mind is calm. There are no thoughts or images or worries. He closes his eyes. Feels Shepard reach for him. Tangles their limbs in a bed too small for two grown men. Begins to fall asleep listening to Shepard's heartbeat as it slows and his breathing evens out. Forgets the chain of command. Forgets everything except the sharp ache of love overwhelming his defenses more and more every day. Hoping vaguely that whatever they find on Ilos isn't enough to take it away.


End file.
